Hi everyone :)

I'm still not feeling great, but I feel slightly better than I did Thursday night. I might go to the doctor's office early this week. My mom is now sick too. :(

School is so close to being over... All I have left is a week and a half. I have two or three papers to write and a bunch of tests to study for. I'm so exhausted. I honestly don't know how I'm going to get through this term.

I hope everyone had a great weekend!

I'm sorry that I haven't been around. It's been forever since I've updated! The past week has been sheer hell. It has been storming here... It's supposed to storm until at least Saturday. This weather is just killing me.

Yesterday I had counseling... My therapist told me that she isn't equipped to deal with my case and she referred me to two others. Oh well. I'm pretty upset -- I feel betrayed. I understand why she did that and everything, but... I don't know. I did my research, she was a therapist for mostly women and she had experience with chronic illness and fibromyalgia. However, it seems that she has dealt with more acute cases of fibro and I have a rather severe case. It took so much strength for me to admit that I need help and to start going to her, and now I have to do that again...

13 days until I'm out of school for the summer and 40 days until my surgery.

I do not feel well at all. I feel like throwing up... I'm super dizzy and the room is so warm. I think I'm leaving class soon.

Hi! How is everyone's day going? Today was a long day for me. I slept great last night! After my concert last night, Kolton and I went and got dinner and then went for a lovely walk. I'm pretty sure that the walk guaranteed me sleeping well. We went to breakfast and lunch together today, which was quite lovely. We went to the mall and I got some new nose studs and some makeup. Victoria's Secret is having a 75 percent off sale on their makeup! I got some great eyeshadow, lip gloss, and makeup remover for about 12 dollars instead of over 40 dollars! It was awesome. After the mall we took a really nice nap. I fell asleep super quickly and slept like a rock. After the nap, we went to a swampy area and went 'frogging.' We tried to catch frogs with nets. I was able to catch one! I also caught a crawfish. Kolton caught a few crawfish, a dragonfly larvae, and a tadpole. He almost got a frog too, but it swam out of his net. It was so much fun! I fell in the mud. Right now Kolton and I are at his dad's house watching movies with his dad and his brother. Kolton was nice and let me borrow his shower and some clothes so I didn't have to sit around in muddy clothes.

I'm hoping that the exercise I've been doing lately will help my fibro. I've been doing more stretching than normal and I've also been walking a lot. I've been getting exhausted very quickly again. My back is still really bothering me too... Hopefully it'll stop soon. I'm really tired of this flare.

I hope everyone has a great night! I'll talk to you all tomorrow.

Star Gazing and Dreaming

Today was busy, busy, busy! I was feeling okay this morning and made it to all three of my classes! I then had a jazz concert in the evening, which both my family and Kolton attended. The concert went well, it was rather stressful though. I'm just glad it's over to be honest... I have been really stressed out over it! After the concert, Kolton and I went to get a bite to eat and then we went for a lovely walk... We went to a river and walked around... It was amazing. We climbed a hill and sat at the top, gazing up at the stars and talking.

My fibro is okay. I'm not feeling nearly as bad as I have been, thankfully.

I am very excited - I found out that there is someone else on campus, that is my age, that has fibro! I mean, it's horrid that she has it... But I'm glad I'm not alone.

I'm exhausted, so I'll write more tomorrow. Night! ♥

Sleepless Nights...

I'm really tired. I barely slept last night, I spent the entire night tossing and turning. Kolton was a sweetheart and talked to me for quite a while on the phone, which helped. I woke up this morning in extreme pain, again. I feel like this is never going to end and that I just can't catch a break. My entire back is very tight and sore. I'm unable to move enough to get to classes again. I don't know how in the world I'm going to get through the rest of this term. 23 more days until I'm out of classes for the summer, and 50 days until my ACL Reconstruction surgery. When I checked my email this morning, I saw that my chronic illness counselor had emailed me, telling me she's unable to meet with us (Kolton & I) this week... I haven't seen her since April 29th. I was really looking forward to the meeting this week, I really need to talk about this flare and I don't want to burden Kolton with it.

My sleep medicine is finally in! I had to mail-order all of my upkeep medications, and they have been delayed... But they're finally here! I'll finally be able to sleep again. ☺ For sleep, I take 25mg of Elavil. It really helps me.

I don't know what to do with myself right now. Kolton is working until at least 5pm (or did he start at 5pm? I can't remember anymore), so he won't be here to help me until then. I can't get up to go to classes... I guess that means it's another day spent wasted. I'm going to try to study, but I'm rather foggy and I know that I'm just going to get really frustrated from not being able to remember anything. Oh well.

Flares and fogs.

Today I feel just exhausted. Yesterday really seems to have taken a toll on me... It was very emotionally stressful. I'm not feeling that well. I keep coughing and I have a migraine. I'm really tired of being sick. This flare has been going on for over two months now. That is ridiculous! My fog has been really bad.

I'm so tired of finding shoes in the fridge or my textbooks with my dishes. I just want to be normal for once. I'm really tired of having to limit my activities so I don't hurt myself or so I don't pay for it later. I just want a chance to be able to live normally! Blahhhh.

I am just fed up with all of this. I have been losing most of my friends because I don't have the energy to keep up friendships or people don't understand that I can't always be there. Oh well...

On a happier note, that picture is the caricature that Kolton and I got yesterday. ☺We're so dorky, but I love it.

Long days and even longer nights.

Today was a long day. My significant other, Kolton, went to the emergency room because he was having a lot of trouble breathing and there was a pool of blood on his pillowcase when he woke up. After a few hours at the emergency room they diagnosed him with bronchitis. He's feeling better now, thankfully! I wasn't able to be at the hospital with him, so I stayed at my dorm worrying. He eventually came over and we went to a festival my college was hosting. We won prizes and got a caricature done. ☺ It was fun.

I'm laying in bed right now, trying to wind down. I'm watching the movie Cadillac Records, which is really interesting. My lower back and knee are giving me a lot of problems right now... I really wish that the pain wasn't so bad. I don't want to take any medicine though... I'm so sick of medicine. I'd really like a day that the pain wasn't so bad without me having to take medication. Oh well.

Time to go lay down and watch the rest of my movie. Goodnight. ♥