In the past few days, I have realized that I don't remember a time before I was sick anymore. I've had fibromyalgia for 6 or 7 years now, since I was 14 or 15. I was diagnosed at 16. I'm now 21. This realization has really upset me. I've been crying a lot today. I'm just so very tired... Tired of always being in pain, tired of living like this, tired of disappointing people, tired of disappointing myself. I want to be normal. I want to be able to go to class every day and study and get good grades. I want to stop angering those around me.
I'm so tired and so sick. My pain levels have been extremely high. My pain pills aren't working. I'm out of morphine until next Wednesday -- I didn't make an appointment early enough and so I'm seeing my doctor 2 weeks later than I normally would.
I'm sorry that my blogs have been depressing recently. I'm really having a hard time.
I am sorry you are having a hard time. I hope your pain levels go down today and stay down until you see your doctor. hang in there, you just finished a stressful (yet fun) trip, give yourself some time to recover. Hope you feel better now.
ReplyDeleteWhen I'm out of drugs, I ask my pharmacy to call the doctor for a refill and he will usually grant it. I don't know if morphine is special, but it's worth a try.
ReplyDeleteI wrote a blog post about what "normal" means when you have Fibro. It's different. Hopefully it helps you feel a bit better.
http://xsarenkax.blogspot.com/2010/05/chronic-illness-new-perspective.html
Morphine is a schedule 2 drug and you must have a physical prescription in order to receive the medication. The doctor can't call in any refills for it unfortunately. :( Dr. W gave me a second prescription in case this happens again at least.
ReplyDeleteI will definitely go check out that post! :)